Wherefore Art Thou Snotrockets

 

Oh look it’s another “Giants lost, few snotrockets” post. Yay. I can never get enough of those.

It’s only the second week of the season and already I’m cranky and cynical. This is not good. That “3 World Series titles in five years” high didn’t last long. Or at least it lasted until the Giants slid right into a 7 game losing streak. Add to that the fact that Madison Bumgarner is apparently blowing fewer snotrockets this year (more on that later) and it totals up to one cranky Giants fan and snotrocket aficionado.

But on to more important matters. Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Thursday, April 16, 2015 at home vs. the Arizona Diamondbacks:

 

  • ND, 7.0 IP, 6 H, 4 R, 4 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, 2 HR, 1 HBP, 4 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 2 vs. righties, 2 other. 1 double SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner now with 11 snotrockets so far in the 2015 season.

 

Even though there weren’t many snotrockets in last night’s game @SanDiegoGiants still managed to come up with some great snotrocket screencaps. From Bumgarner’s double snotrocket in the fifth inning here’s the left side:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-16-1-Left Side

 

And here’s the right side:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-16-2-Right Side

 

And the last snotrocket of the game:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-16-3

 

There’s a mystery afoot, or anose, or whatever. Madison Bumgarner appears to be blowing fewer snotrockets this season, when compared to previous seasons. Giants fans took notice on Twitter:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-16-Twitter

 

Wherefore art thou snotrockets, Bumgarner? Bring back, oh bring back, bring back my snotrockets to meeeee…yeah okay I’ll stop now.

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Wednesday, April 22, 2015 at home vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (eeuww). See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

Few And Far Between Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner’s second outing of the 2015 season was short in innings and short on snotrockets. A lose-lose situation all the way around.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, April 11, 2015 on the road vs. the San Diego Padres:

 

  • L, 3.0 IP, 10 H, 5 R, 5 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, 2 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 2 vs. righties, 0 other.
  • Bumgarner now with 7 snotrockets so far in the 2015 season.
  • This game’s total of 2 SNR (snotrockets) is the fewest amount of SNR that Bumgarner has blown since 9/13/13 (1 SNR vs. Dodgers).

 

Snotrocket screencapper @SanDiegoGiants attended the game and got some in-person snotrocket shots. Here’s one early on in the game:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-11-1

 

And one impressionistic decapitated snotrocket:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-11

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Thursday, April 16, 2015 at home vs. the Arizona Diamondbacks. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

2015 Opening Day Snotrockets

 

Nothing signifies Opening Day better for the San Francisco Giants than a well-placed snotrocket.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Monday, April 6, 2015 on the road vs. the Arizona Diamondbacks:

  • W, 7.0 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 3 K, 2 HBP, 5 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. lefties, 2 vs. righties, 2 other.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 2 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 5 snotrockets so far in 2015.

So as we give thanks for Madison Bumgarner’s glorious snotrockets we must also give thanks to @SanDiegoGiants  for the glorious snotrocket screencaps that he posts on Twitter. Here’s the first Bumgarner snotrocket of the 2015 season:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-06

Another snotrocket from the 1st inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-06-1

Bumgarner’s first at-bat snotrocket of the 2015 season:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-06-2

Last snotrocket of the game:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-06-3

Also during the game @SanDiegoGiants took note of the new Pace of Game rules that MLB has established and gave them a Bumgarner twist:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2015-04-06-Pace Of Game

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be this Saturday, April 11, 2015 on the road vs. the San Diego Padres. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

2014 Snotrockets In Review

 

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 18,000 times in 2014. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 7 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

Merry Snotrocketmas

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good snotrocket

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-Stickers-Santa Hat-1

104 days

or

2496 hours

or

149,760 minutes

or

8,985,600 seconds

until Opening Day Snotrockets. See you April 6, 2015 here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action!

2014 World Series Snotrockets: Game 7

 

What can you say about Madison Bumgarner that hasn’t already been said? All the superlatives in the English language have been used.  Legendary. Incredible. Beast. Thrilling. Impeccable:

Giants-2014-World Series-Tweets-MLB-Bumgarner WS Stats

Also: The Best. Stone-Cold Champ. Dominating. My personal favorite? Madison Bumgarner is a San Francisco Giant. That puts a thrill into my heart that no other turn of phrase could do half as well. I’m so happy and grateful that he’s a Giant. Plus…snotrockets!

Madison Bumgarner came into The World Series Game 7 in the bottom of the 5th inning, after Giants starter Tim Hudson went 1.2 innings and reliever Jeremy Affeldt pitched 2.1 innings. Most people expected Bumgarner to go a couple of innings  and then probably Giants manager Bruce Bochy would bring in Sergio Romo for the 8th and closer Santiago Casilla for the 9th. Bumgarner had other ideas. After having pitched a brilliant complete game, 4 hit 0 walks shutout on Sunday Bumgarner came in to pitch 5 scoreless innings and get the save on only two days rest. Is he human? Is he part man, part machine? These questions will baffle  baseball fans and writers for days and weeks to come.

Now let’s get on to more important business. Relief appearance snotrockets! Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Wednesday, October 30, 2014 on the road vs. the Kansas City Royals:

 

  • S, 5.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, 7 SNR (snotrockets): 3 vs. lefties, 4 vs. righties, 0 other. 2 double SNR. 1 double blow  SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 5th and the 9th in which he blew 2 snotrockets per inning.
  • Bumgarner finishes with 56 snotrockets in the 2014 postseason and 393 snotrockets in the regular season.

 

On Twitter @SanDiegoGiants won the award for Most Valuable Snotrocket Screencapper, firing up his snotrocket screencapping machine at a moment’s notice and captured some fine Bumgarner snotrockets for posterity. Here’s one from the 5th inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-29

 

Another snotrocket from the 5th:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-29-1

 

A 6th inning snotrocket:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-29-2

 

At exactly 7:58 PM in the 8th inning Bumgarner blew this snotrocket:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-29-3

 

Bonus Bumgarner pics: after the Giants won the game 3-2 and were declared World Series champions Madison Bumgarner was awarded the World Series MVP trophy:

Giants-2014-World Series-Celebration-Bumgarner-MVP Trophy-2

 

Madison Bumgarner with the World Series trophy, which the Giants never could have won without him:

Giants-2014-World Series-Celebration-Bumgarner-World Series Trophy

 

Even though the game was over Bumgarner didn’t want it to end:

Tweets-SFGmen2012-Bumgarner-Still Wanna Pitch-2014

 

Earlier, Madison Bumgarner with both trophies in the MVP award ceremony. Joining Bumgarner are Chevy Guy, Fox Sports sportscaster Erin Andrews and confused monkey, err I mean departing MLB commissioner Bud Selig:

Giants-2014-World Series-Celebration-Bumgarner-MVP Trophy-Ceremony-Chevy Guy-Selig

 

How could I forget the Buster Hugs?

Giants-2014-World Series-Celebration-Bumgarner-Posey-Buster Hugs-2

 

Giants-2014-World Series-Celebration-Bumgarner-Posey-Buster Hugs-1

 

Giants-2014-World Series-Celebration-Bumgarner-Posey-Buster Hugs

 

This duo has been together for a long time. Here are Madison Bumgarner and Buster Posey in their first game together in 2009 as minor leaguers with the Giants Class A-Advanced team, the San Jose Giants:

Giants-Bumgarner-Posey-San Jose-2009

 

They look so young, like boys on their way to a Little League game:

Tweets-FL-SanDiegoGiants-Bumgarner-Posey-Cookies And Milk

 

Here endeth the Madison Bumgarner  snotrocket season. See you here or on Twitter in 2015 for all the exciting snotrocket action.

2014 World Series Snotrockets: Game 5

 

What else can you say about Madison Bumgarner. No superlatives super enough. I’ll just leave this here:

Tweets-MLBOnFox-Bumgarner-World Series Career-2014-1

 

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Sunday, October 26, 2014 at home vs. the Kansas City Royals:

 

  • W, 9.0 IP, 4 H, 0 BB, 0 R, 0 ER, 8 K, 10 SNR (snotrockets): 3 vs. lefties, 3 vs. righties, 4 other. 2 pre-game SNR. 2 at-bat SNR. 1 double SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 49 snotrockets in the 2014 postseason.

 

While Madison Bumgarner was dazzling AT&T Park with his marvelous pitching snotrocket screencapper @SanDiegoGiants dazzled Twitter with some superior snotrocket screencaps. Here’s a snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26

 

There was a Bumgarner classic double snotrocket in the 6th inning. First the left side:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-1

 

And then the right:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-2

 

Hey how about some closeups? Left side:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-1B

 

Right side:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-2C

 

An at-bat snotrocket in the 8th inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-3

 

Another snotrocket from the same at-bat, immediately after Bumgarner struck out:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-4

 

Fox Sports finally realized what a nasal goldmine they had with Bumgarner’s snotrockets and provided a different view of the same snotrocket:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-5

 

@SanDiegoGiants crowned Bumgarner with a new award:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-26-7-Tweet-1

 

Bonus Bumgarner pics, anyone? Bumgarner struck out during one at-bat and immediately expressed his displeasure by taking a bite out of his bat:

Giants-Bumgarner-Bat Bite-2014-10-26

 

And after another at-bat where he popped up Bumgarner expressed his displeasure thusly:

Giants-Bumgarner-Bat Head-2014-10-26

 

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start will be on Opening Day in April 2015. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

2014 World Series Snotrockets: Game 1

 

Ho hum, another brilliant World Series outing for Madison Bumgarner. The man is greatness personified in fantastic pitching and excellent snotrockets. We are definitely not worthy, and we should always be grateful:

Tweets-FL-Bumgarner Daily Thanks

 

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Tuesday, October 21, 2014 on the road vs. the San Francisco Giants:

 

  • W, 7.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 5 K, 1 HR, 12 SNR (snotrockets): 2 vs. lefties, 5 vs. righties, 5 other. 1 mound visit SNR with Buster Posey in attendance. 1 double blow SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 3rd in which he blew 4 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 39 snotrockets in the 2014 postseason.

 

In addition to giving thanks for Bumgarner’s snotrockets let us also be grateful to @SanDiegoGiants for once again getting some fantastic snotrocket screencaps. Here’s a sly back-to-the-camera snotrocket in the bottom of the 1st inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-22

 

A more traditional snotrocket from the 1st inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-22-1

 

A slightly more violent snotrocket from the 2nd inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-22-2

 

Another Bumgarner snotrocket had @SanDiegoGiants perturbed:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-22-3-Tweet

 

Can you see it? Not close enough for you? Here, try this one:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-22-3

 

LOOK AT IT:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-22-3-Closeup

 

Runners-on-second-and-third-but-no-runs-scored snotrocket:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-21-4

 

Rapid fire twin snotrockets:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-21-5

 

Victorious snotrocket from the 4th inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-21-6

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start could be this Sunday, October 26, 2014 at home vs. the Kansas City Royals. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting World Series snotrocket action.

2014 NLCS Snotrockets: Game 5

 

Another game on Fox. And not even actually Fox but Fox Sports One. What, the National League playoffs aren’t good enough for the real Fox station? MLB had to put it on an obscure TV station buried in no man’s land. Don’t they care about drawing more viewers, achieving new fans? How can people, new fans and old, watch the game when they can’t even locate the channel? Or they can’t locate the channel because their cable package doesn’t even carry it? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL???

Rant over.

Wait, one more thing:

Tweets-FL-Cotton Candy-Snotrockets

There’s no great loss without some small gain.

Madison Bumgarner had another well-pitched game the other night but only got a no-decision for his efforts. The Giants hit several home runs in the game. Nothing else very exciting happened in the game except OH MY GOD THE GIANTS WON THE PENNANT!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT??? THIRD WORLD SERIES APPEARANCE IN FIVE YEARS!!! WAIT AM I FORGETTING SOMETHING??? OH YES THE SNOTROCKETS!!! I mean, oh yes the snotrockets. Forgive me, I was carried away there for a moment.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Thursday, October 16, 2014 at home vs. the St. Louis Cardinals:

 

  • ND, 8.0 IP, 5 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, 2 HR, 5 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 4 vs. righties, 1 other. 1 double blow SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 3rd in which he blew 4 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 27 snotrockets in the 2014 postseason.

 

One person that kept his cool and and got some great snotrocket screencaps was @SanDiegoGiants.  The first snotrocket of the night didn’t arrive until the 3rd inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-16

 

The next snotrocket is  more delicate in appearance:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-16-1

 

The third snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-16-2

 

The last snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-16-3

 

And the last snotrocket of the game. Note Cardinals manager Mike Matheny rudely ignoring Bumgarner’s magnificent nostril magic:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-16-4

 

Bonus Bumgarner goodies: After the Giants won the Wild Card game (vs. the Pittsburgh Pirates, suck it Russell Martin) Bumgarner celebrated with four beers:

Giants-2014-Wild Card-Celebration-Bumgarner-Four Beers-Closeup

 

After the Giants won the National League Division Series (vs. the Washington Nationals, suck it Bryce Harper) Bumgarner celebrated with five beers:

Giants-2014-NLDS-Game 4-Celebration-Bumgarner-Five Beers-4A

 

And after the Giants won the National League Championship series (vs. the St. Louis Cardinals, suck it A.J. Pierzynski you gigantic shit toad) Bumgarner upped the stakes with a six beer performance:

Giants-2014-NLCS-Celebration-Bumgarner-Six Beers

 

Attaboy Bumgarner.

Madison Bumgarner’s next start will be on Tuesday, October 21, 2014 on the road vs. the Kansas City Royals. First game of the World Series. Be there, be here or on Twitter  for all the exciting Fall Classic snotrocket action.

2014 NLCS Snotrockets: Game 1

 

Two snotrockets in the 1st inning and Madison Bumgarner was off to a great start. Unfortunately after the 1st the greatness only extended to his pitching as the rest of the game only saw a mere two more snotrockets.  As always I blame Fox Sports and their questionable camerawork:

Tweets-FL-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-Fox Cameras

 

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, October 11, 2014 on the road vs. the St. Louis Cardinals:

 

  • W, 7.2 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 7 K, 4 SNR (snotrockets): 3 vs. lefties, 0 vs. righties, 1 other. 1 double SNR.
  •  Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 2 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 22 snotrockets in the 2014 postseason.

 

Even though the snotrockets were skimpy in numbers @SanDiegoGiants defied the powers that be at Fox and still got some great snotrocket screencaps anyway. Here’s one from the 1st inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-11

 

A snotrocket from the second inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-11-1

 

Can you see the snotrocket spray? No? Maybe this closeup will help:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-11-1B

 

@SanDiegoGiants was so impressed by that last snotrocket that he immortalized it in collage form:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-11-1-Collage

 

An especially ferocious snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2014-10-11-2

 

That last snotrocket screencap put me in a quandary:

Tweets-FL-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-Favorite

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start will probably be Thursday, October 16, 2014 at home vs. the St. Louis Cardinals. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting postseason snotrocket action.

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