Best of 2016 Snotrockets

 

No Moore more snotrockets in 2016. The San Francisco Giants season is over after one of the most horrific losses that I’ve seen since The-World-Series-That-We-Still-Do-Not-Speak-Of-Even-Though-The-Giants-Have-Won-3-World-Series-Since-Then aka game 6 in the 2002 World Series. It was bad then. It’s bad now. I’m sad now. What could possibly make me feel better? Madison Bumgarner snotrockets of course.

2016 wasn’t exactly a banner year for Bumgarner SNR (snotrockets):

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-02-tweet-year-totals

 

But even though the snotrockets weren’t as plentiful this season as they have been in years past that doesn’t mean there weren’t some good ones being expressed by the King of the Snotrockets. Madison Bumgarner may have slowed down in his snotrocket production but I’m just grateful that he’s still out there snotrocketing at all. I mean, if he ever stopped shooting mucus out of his nostrils I  wouldn’t handle it well:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-11-tweet-sinuses

 

Let’s take a look back at some of the wonderful snotrockets that Madison Bumgarner produced this past season. And this is about as good a time as any to express my extreme gratitude to @SanDiegoGiants for all the terrific snotrocket screencaps that he came up with this season and in seasons past. For so many of MadBum’s starts @SanDiegoGiants was hard at work capturing Bum’s snotrockets for posterity and I cannot thank him enough for it. Without his efforts this blog would just be some words and numbers, a vast wasteland, colorless and bleak. Picture a world without Bumgarner snotrocket screencaps in it. I imagine it would look something like this:

wasteland-desert

 

The first Bumgarner snotrocket of the season is always one to cherish. This beauty was a hidden one and blown on April 4, 2016 on the road vs. the Milwaukee Brewers:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-04-04

 

Glove snotrockets (using the gloved hand) are a rare commodity (Bumgarner only had 6 of them this season). The first glove SNR of the 2016 season also occurred on April 4th:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-04-04-3-glove

 

At-bat snotrockets are not as rare as glove ones but still pretty special. Here’s one from the April 25th game vs. the San Diego Padres:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-04-25-4

 

Another at-bat snotrocket from the June 14th game vs. the Brewers. Look at how the home plate umpire is rudely ignoring Bumgarner’s nasal magnificence:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-06-14-2

 

This next snotrocket is an especially fine-looking one as it involved much spray. It was blown on May 28, 2016 on the road vs. the Rockies:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-28-1

 

ICYMTM (In Case You Missed The Mucus) here’s a closeup:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-28-1-zoom

Just look at that spray action. Beautiful.

 

I like this one because it’s clear and sharp and Bumgarner’s got a good snarl going. From June 25, 2016 vs. the Phillies:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-06-25

 

A sly postseason snotrocket from the Wild Card game:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-2

 

Bumgarner double snotrockets are a personal favorite of mine because I get 2 for the price of one. On May 1 vs. the New York Mets Bumgarner blew 2 double SNR (double doubles!). Here’s one set, with the left nostril up first:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-01-5-double-left

 

And then the right nostril:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-01-5-double-right

 

And the second double snotrocket from the same game with once again the left nostril up first:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-01-7-double-left

 

Right nostril says ‘hey don’t forget about me’:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-01-7-double-right

 

Black jersey double snotrocket (good band name) with the right nostril first:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-06-double-right

 

And then the left nostril:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-06-double-left

 

If you’re fortunate enough to be a teammate of Madison Bumgarner then you might have some snotrocket magic rub off on you and if that happens then you should be both glad and grateful. Matt Duffy and Matt Moore (ironically traded for each other) can attest to this. Each channeled their inner Bumgarner this season. First up is Duffy:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-06-14-duffy-snotrocket

 

Moore mixes it up a little and uses a thumb for his snotrocket:

giants-moore-snotrocket-2016-08-04

 

Those were nice but there’s nothing like the real thing. Let’s get back to Madison. How about some hot interleague Bumgarner snotrocket action vs. the A’s:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-06-30-4

 

I love this one because it also has guest appearances by Brandon Crawford and Angel Pagan. Both of them look like they’re running in to see Bumgarner blow a snotrocket but they were too late:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-06-30-1

 

More interleague snotrocket action, this time vs. the Yankees:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-07-22

 

This next one is nice because you get the approach to the nose, then the snotrocket plus some Giants history to boot. First the approach:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-approach

 

Then the actual snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-1

 

One Giants game saw a guest snotrocket screencapper: @iamjerklord, filling in for @SanDiegoGiants who was on non-snotrocket assignment. @iamjerklord proved to be such a phenom at snotrocket screencapping that she put someone’s non-job at risk:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-tweet-wally-pipp

 

Some of @iamjerklord‘s handiwork – the classic front-facing nose bender snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-4

 

The Dodgers’ Yasiel Puig makes a cameo appearance in two of Bumgarner’s snotrockets from that same game. First up is right after Puig struck out:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-8-tweet

 

The second one is an extremely rare snotrocket screencap, one of only two in existence. Feast your eyes on a split screen snotrocket screencap with Bumgarner snotrocketing on the left and Puig at home plate on the right:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-3-split-screen-puig

 

Also from the same game – Dodger snotblock:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-9-tweet

 

Madison Bumgarner has many fans, both of his pitching and his snotrocketing. The most talented has to be @JohnGehrke who made this fantastic video featuring MadBum and his amazing snotrockets. Check it out, even the infamous Chevy Guy makes a cameo appearance:

 

You might think that Madison Bumgarner is limited to just outstanding pitching and snotrocketing. You couldn’t be more wrong. Mr. Bumgarner is a Renaissance man, an accomplished artist that expresses himself in many mediums.  Besides the snotrocket there is – behold – the loogie:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-loogie-tweet

 

Two loogies for the price of one. First the pre loogie bubble:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-loogie-1-globule

 

Then the post loogie spray:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-loogie-1-spray

 

May 28th loogie:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-28-loogie

 

Dark Night of the Loogie:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-06-loogie

 

Postseason Wild Card loogie:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-loogie

 

Then there’s the crotch grab/cup twitch that Bumgarner dabbles in almost every game. You know, just to mix it up a little with the snotrockets and loogies. From an at home game vs. the Rockies in May:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-06-crotch-grab

 

Pitching aggressively, crotch grabbing the same:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-crotch-grab-tweet

 

At times this season the cupping shots outnumbered the snotrocketing ones:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-cup-twitching

 

That which we call a cup twitch by any other name would look as sweet:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-28-widget-fiddle-tweets

 

As much as I love the Bumgarner cup twitches the Bumgarner wedgie picks hold a dearer place in my heart:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-01-wedgie-pick-tweet

 

Epic full on closeup wedgie pick from the August 23rd game vs. the Dodgers:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-23-wedgie-pick

 

Postseason wedgie pick:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-wedgie-pick-tweet

 

Mr. Bumgarner is so creative and is always trying to come up with new ways to entertain his fans:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-06-30-eye-pick-tweet

 

Four part eye wipe vs. the Atlanta Braves on Aug. 28th:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-28-tweet-eye-wipe

 

Because the tweet cut part of the photos off here are four closeups of the eye wipe in order:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-28-eye-wipe-1

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-28-eye-wipe-2

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-28-eye-wipe-3

 

Part four actually saw Bumgarner going in for a second eye wipe, nice:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-28-eye-wipe-4

 

So Bumgarner has snotrockets, loogies, cup twitching/crotch grabs and eye wipes in his repertoire. Surely that must be it, you’re thinking. Oh no. Not even close. Behold the ear dig:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-04-15-ear-dig

 

And the tooth pick:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-28-tooth-pick-tweet

 

The glove chew:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-glove-chew-tweet

 

Not to be confused with the glove wipe:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-08-07-tweet-sdg-double-glove-wipe

 

Then there’s the snotrocket’s close cousin, the nose wipe:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-dramatic-nose-wipe-2016-04-25-tweet

 

The Bumgarner loogies, cup twitches, wedgie picks etc. are all fabulous but nothing could ever replace the classic snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-06-08

 

In case you couldn’t tell I love absolutely everything that Madison Bumgarner does but:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-05-28-tweet-fl-never-finds-out

 

Always and forever:

tweets-fl-bumgarner-thank-you-never-change-2016

 

Thank you to everyone who stopped by here to take a look; I appreciate each and every one of you. Have a good off-season and see you here or on Twitter in 2017 for all the exciting Madison Bumgarner snotrocket action.

 

2016 NLDS Game 3 Snotrockets

Madison Bumgarner is so great that I sometimes forget he is human. With everything that he’s accomplished in his career so far it just doesn’t seem possible that he is a mere mortal. I think of him as godlike and always achieving perfection in every start and when that doesn’t happen it’s a shock to the system.

Tonight Mr. Bumgarner’s phenomenal scoreless streak in postseason elimination games is over at 24.2 innings. He had a rough 2nd inning in tonight’s game, giving up a 3 run homer to the Cubs pitcher Jake Arrieta. That hurt to watch:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-10-tweet-tears

But Bumgarner never gave up another run after that and threw well for 3 more innings, finishing his night with 5 innings pitched and only 3 runs allowed:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-10-tweet-a-stuff

The Giants finally started hitting and scoring runs tonight, enough to go ahead not once but twice and ultimately won the game. I won’t go into all the craziness of tonight’s game (and there was a ton of it) because this is primarily a Bumgarner snotrocket blog but also because as I’m writing this it’s 2:00 AM and I need sleep. But don’t get me wrong because I’m not complaining:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-10-3-am

America isn’t complaining either:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-10-tweet-america-won

So this was a great night for the Giants and America but don’t let us forget it was a great night for the Bumgarner snotrocket fans too. Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Monday, October 10, 2016 at home vs. the Chicago Cubs:

  • ND, 5.0 IP, 7 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, 1 HR, 4 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 2 vs. righties, 2 other.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 2nd in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 12 snotrockets in the 2016 postseason.

Even though there weren’t a lot of snotrockets in tonight’s game @SanDiegoGiants did manage to capture one:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-10

But before you sing his praises just LOOK AT THIS BLASPHEMY that he tweeted out 8 minutes later:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-10-tweet-no-longer-believe

However I suppose such profane tweeting can be forgiven because the Giants’ deranged style of baseballing in 2016 has been enough to drive the sanest fan psychotic. And Bumgarner’s premier snotrocket screencapper did rally a short time later to capture the ever popular Bumgarner loogie(albeit a dry one):

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-10-loogie

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be…? Again it’s up in the air. Everything depends on the outcome of game 4 being played a little more than 12 hours from now. If the Giants win then there will be a game 5 two days later and potentially Bumgarner could pitch a few innings of relief in that. So let’s just cross our fingers, toes, eyes and anything else you can manage to cross and wish and hope and pray for one more victory for the San Francisco Giants because it not only means they stay alive in the postseason but it also means more Bumgarner snotrockets. And that is always a great thing.

When Madison Bumgarner pitches next I’ll see you here and on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

2016 NL Wild Card Snotrockets

That man did it again:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-tweet-mlbonfox-wild-card-performances

That man shines in the postseason:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-tweet-sportscenter-thoroughbred

That man is in some pretty good company:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-tweet-sportscenter-5th-pitcher

But that man also stands alone:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-tweet-jaysonst-two-shutouts

That man:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-tweet-br-that-is-all

The San Francisco Giants faced the New York Mets tonight in the National League Wild Card game. As you can tell from all the tweets above Madison Bumgarner was his usual brilliant self in the post season and the Giants won 3-0 to advance to the NL Division Series, the 4th time in 7 years they’ve done so. Sometimes I forget to give my daily thanks for Bumgarner existing on this planet and pitching for the Giants and for this I should be made to suffer. Madison Bumgarner as a Giant deserves constant praise, worship, zero criticism and whenever he walks by people should be required by law to bow down or do this:

giants-2014-world-series-game-5-we-are-not-worthy

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Wednesday, October 6, 2016 on the road vs. the New York Mets:

  • W, 9.0 IP, 4 H, 2 BB, 0 R, 0 ER, 6 K, 8 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 6 vs.righties, 2 other. 1 thumb SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 5th, 8th and 9th in which he blew 2 snotrockets per inning.
  • Bumgarner now with 8 SNR in the 2016 postseason.

MLB doesn’t give out an MVP award for the Wild Card game but if they did of course Mr. Bumgarner would be a shoo-in (sorry Conor Gillaspie) for the honor tonight. Twitter doesn’t give out an MVP award for best Bumgarner snotrocket screencapper but if they did @SanDiegoGiants would run away with the thing (runner-up @iamjerklord). Scoreless snotrocket in the bottom of the 4th inning:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-1

Still scoreless but a runner on 2nd and 1 out snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-2

Bumgarner demonstrates his appreciation for his teammate’s 3 run homer:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-3-tweet

Bonus Bumgarner screencaps – wild wedgie edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-wedgie-pick-tweet

Wild loogie edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-loogie-tweet

Wild cup twitch edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-cup-twitch-tweet

Exciting cup twitching closeups because you know you want them. Part one:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-cup-twitch-1

Part two:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-cup-twitch-2

Before Gillaspie hit a 3 run homer in the top of the 9th it had been a scoreless duel between Madison Bumgarner and the Mets’ Noah Syndergaard, leaving some to wonder how long the game might go on. No worries about Bumgarner though:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-tweet-22-scoreless

You know when there’s a Madison Bumgarner postseason victory a Buster Hug is sure to follow:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-buster-hug

Too adorable for words:

giants-2016-wild-card-bumgarner-posey-buster-hug

Post game victory celebration:

giants-2016-wild-card-celebration-bumgarner-beer-shower-tweet

All smiles in the clubhouse after the Giants win:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-10-05-wild-card-alguacil-tweet

So humble:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-selfies-with-cops-tweet

After Bumgarner’s masterful win tonight there was speculation on Twitter about the Giants possible rotation for the upcoming NLDS:

giants-2016-wild-card-tweet-rotation-vs-cubs

Sorrynotsorry Mets:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-see-you-mets-tweet

Sorrynotsorry Mets and Pirates:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-wild-card-tweet-ruined-a-wild-card

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Monday, October 10, 2016 at home vs. the Chicago Cubs. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting postseaon snotrocket action.

2016 Regular Season Snotrocket Totals

 

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s 2016 regular season SNR (snotrocket) totals:

  • Total: 233 SNR  (34 starts)
  • Day: 82 (11 starts)
  • Night: 151 (23 starts)
  • Home: 124 (17 starts)
  • Road: 109 (17 starts)
  • vs. lefties: 25
  • vs. righties: 113
  • Other: 95
  • Pre-game: 10
  • Glove: 6
  • At-bat: 15
  • Dugout: 5
  • Double: 18
  • Double-blow: 2
  • On base: 1
  • Closed roof: 11
  • Win: 132 (15 wins)
  • Loss: 51 (9 losses)
  • No Decision: 50 (10 ND)

 

2016 regular season SNR (snotrocket) totals by team:

vs. Dodgers: 37 SNR (5 starts)

  • vs. L: 4
  • vs. R: 13
  • Other: 20
  • Pre-game: 2
  • Dugout: 5
  • At-bat: 2
  • Glove: 2
  • Double: 2
  • Double-blow: 1

vs. DBacks: 15 SNR (3 starts)

  • vs. L: 1
  • vs. R: 8
  • Other: 6
  • Double: 1

vs. Padres: 32 SNR (5 starts)

  • vs. L: 3
  • vs. R: 17
  • Other: 12
  • Pre-game: 2
  • At-bat: 3
  • Double: 1

vs. Rockies: 14 SNR (3 starts)

  • vs. L: 2
  • vs. R: 6
  • Other: 6
  • Double: 3
  • At-bat: 1
  • On-base: 1

vs. Cubs: 24 SNR (2 starts)

  • vs. L: 2
  • vs. R: 16
  • Other: 6
  • Pre-game: 1
  • Glove: 1
  • At-bat: 1
  • Double: 2

vs. Brewers: 21 SNR (2 starts)

  • vs. L: 2
  • vs. R: 10
  • Other: 9
  • Pre-game: 1
  • Glove: 2
  • At-bat: 2
  • Double: 1

vs. Reds: 5 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 1
  • vs. R: 3
  • Other: 1

vs. Pirates: 5 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 0
  • vs. R: 3
  • Other: 2

vs. Mets: 14 SNR (2 starts)

  • vs. L: 3
  • vs. R: 6
  • Other: 5
  • At-bat: 3
  • Double: 3

vs. Braves: 12 SNR (2 starts)

  • vs. L: 3
  • vs. R: 9
  • Other: 0

vs. Phillies: 14 SNR (2 starts)

  • vs. L: 0
  • vs. R: 11
  • Other: 3

vs. Nationals: 8 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 0
  • vs. R: 4
  • Other: 4
  • Glove: 1
  • Double: 1

vs. Blue Jays: 7 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 0
  • vs. R: 2
  • Other: 5
  • Pre-game: 1
  • Double: 2
  • Double-blow: 2

vs. Orioles: 8 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 1
  • vs. R: 1
  • Other: 6
  • Pre-game: 1
  • At-bat: 2

vs. Red Sox: 6 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 1
  • vs. R: 1
  • Other: 4
  • Pre-game: 1
  • Double: 1

vs. Yankees: 2 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 0
  • vs. R: 0
  • Other: 2

vs. Athletics: 9 SNR (1 start)

  • vs. L: 2
  • vs. R: 3
  • Other: 4

vs. NL West: 98 (16 starts)

vs. NL Central: 55 (6 starts)

vs. NL East: 48 (7 starts)

vs. AL: 32 (5 starts)

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next game is tonight. Wednesday, October 5, 2016 on the road vs. the New York Mets in the National League Wild Card Game. Am I worried?

tweets-sportscenter-bumgarner-road-era-2016-10-05

 

Nah.

See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Wild Card snotrocket action.

Glorious Snotrockets

 

The San Francisco Giants did many fine things tonight. They scored 9 runs and pummeled the Dodgers (ew). They stayed 1 game ahead of the St. Louis Cardinals in the race for the second Wild Card spot. Buster Posey and Angel Pagan took down two idiots who ran onto the field. And God er I mean Madison Bumgarner blew snotrockets, hit a two run double and won the game. Oh and this also happened:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-tweet-100-wins

 

Very cool and congratulations Mr. Bumgarner!

Obvious tweet is obvious:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-tweet-my-hero

 

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Friday, Sept. 30, 2016 at home vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (ew):

  • W, 7.1 IP, 8 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 1 BB, 5 K, 0 HR, 9 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 2 vs. righties, 7 other. 1 pre-game SNR. 1 at-bat SNR. 1 glove SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 7th in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner finishes the 2016 regular season with 233 snotrockets.

 

Bumgarner’s regular snotrocket screencapper  @SanDiegoGiants was on assignment Friday night so his partner in crime @iamjerklord filled in for him and did such an admirable job that:

 

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-tweet-wally-pipp

 

First snotrocket of the game:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-1

 

Sly and tied snotrocket in the top of the 2nd inning:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-2

 

Very rare and sure to be a collector’s item – the only known split screen snotrocket screencap in existence, with Bumgarner blowing a snotrocket while sharing the screen with the Dodger’s Yasiel Puig (ew):

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-3-split-screen-puig

 

Classic front-facing nose bender of a snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-4

 

Slick snotrocket in the bottom of the 4th inning:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-5-tweet

 

Another at-bat snotrocket, this time in the bottom of the 6th inning:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-6

 

Top of the 7th and leading by 6 runs snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-7

 

Grab some pine Puig, you just got snotrocketed:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-8-tweet

 

Snotblock in the bottom of the 7th:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-9-tweet

 

Bonus Bumgarner screencaps – I always want Bumgarner loogie edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-loogie-tweet

 

Exciting hand blow edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-hand-blow

 

Bat kiss edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-bat-kiss

 

Crotch action edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-crotch-action-tweet

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-crotch-action-tweet-1

 

Nose wipe edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-nose-wipe

 

Loogie in two parts edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-loogie-1-tweet

 

Loogie closeups because you know you want them. First the bubble:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-loogie-1-globule

 

And then the spray:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-loogie-1-spray

 

Bumgarner hits a double, drives in 2 runs and is STOKED edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-hit-double

 

When Bumgarner comes out of the game and you absolutely need to show your appreciation edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-tweet-standing-ovation

 

Take heed of my tweet edition:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-30-tweet-zero-patience-negative-tweets

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be…? At this time it’s still not 100% certain that the Giants will be appearing in the postseason. We’ll find out in the next couple of days. In the meantime stay strong, support our Giants and most of all give thanks that Madison Bumgarner exists.

Not Centennial Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner was well on his way to getting his 100th career victory tonight but an uncharacteristic 3 home runs given up by Bumgarner plus the 8,436th lead blown by the Giants bullpen this year resulted in another no-decision for Madison. All is well though because the Giants scored 3 in the top of the 10th inning and came away not only with a victory but tied for the NL Wild Card lead. Plus snotrockets! What a great night.

The San Francisco Giants were in San Diego to face the Padres. If you subtract the 3 home runs given up by Bumgarner (and I can do that this is my blog I can write whatever I want so there) then he pitched well and did leave the game with the lead. He also achieved this:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-strikeout-record-cy-seymour

 

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, September 24, 2016 on the road vs. the San Diego Padres:

 

  • ND, 6.0 IP, 4 H, 5 R, 5 ER, 1 BB, 5 K, 3 HR, 6 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. L, 4 vs. R, 1 other. 1 double SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 2nd in which he blew 2 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 224 snotrockets in the 2016 season.

 

Snotrocket screencapper @SanDiegoGiants was at the ballpark for tonight’s game but unfortunately wasn’t able to capture any fresh live snotrockets. The night wasn’t a total loss though:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-on-base

 

Exciting on base closeups because you know you want them. First ‘the pinch’:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-on-base-pinch

 

And then ‘the hmm’:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-on-base

 

Entertaining equipment adjustment:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-cup-problems

 

There was an exciting moment when it was thought that a fresh live snotrocket may have been caught:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-not-a-snotrocket

 

False alarm though:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-not-a-snotrocket-1

 

The scoreboard’s ‘Fun Fact’ doesn’t surprise me at all:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-petco-park-scoreboard-first-word

 

Giants fans know where it’s at:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-snotrocket-signs

 

Reasonable request:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-snotrocket-cam

 

Bumgarner hit 2 doubles in tonight’s game and also fouled a ball off his leg. He limped around for a little but it was really nothing:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-cw-shins-oak

 

Besides the win and the Wild Card tie and the snotrockets this was my favorite aspect of tonight’s game:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-had-his-back

 

True story:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet-hide-the-body

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Thursday, September 29, 2016 at home vs. the Colorado Rockies. Or it could be the next day vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (ew). Either one I’ll be here and on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

Before I go – how cute is this? Baseball’s power couple:

reaction-shots-giants-posey-bumgarner-power-couple

 

Update – WE HAVE A SNOTROCKET

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-tweet

 

Snotrocket closeups – first the approach:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-approach

 

And then the snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-24-1

 

We are not worthy.

Don’t Look At My Snotrockets

 

I had another blog post all prepared where I wrote a couple of lighthearted remarks about the game but I deleted all of that after the 9th inning because I just don’t have the heart to post it now. The Giants bullpen blew yet another save opportunity in the 9th inning in Monday’s game and in doing so they threw away a beautifully pitched game by Madison Bumgarner. Unforgivable. Also, Giants 3rd baseman Eduardo Núñez scratched and clawed and belly-flopped his way around the bases to score the Giants only run. And he scored that run on a wild pitch. So all that effort by Núñez and Bumgarner was wasted because the Giants bullpen just can’t get it done anymore. Giants manager Bruce Bochy can’t get it done anymore. His golden touch has turned to lead. The game that started out so wonderfully ended up a horrific nightmare that may take me years to recover from.  Prophetic tweet:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-bullpen

Hahahaha yeah right

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-three-outs

 

Tension builds:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-radio-bathroom

 

Then the bottom of the 9th inning happened. Twitter meltdown ensues:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-fuck-the-bullpen………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-you-make-me-sick………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-positive-tweets

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-bullpen-excuses

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-fuck-everybody

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Monday, September 19, 2016 on the road vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (ew):

 

  • ND, 7.0 IP, 1 H, 0 BB, 0 R, 0 ER, 10 K, 4 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. lefties, 1 vs. righties, 2 other. 1 dugout SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 2nd, 5th and 6th in which he blew 1 snotrocket per inning.
  • Bumgarner now with 218 snotrockets in the 2016 season.

 

Fortunately for all of us Bumgarner snotrocket enthusiasts @SanDiegoGiants was hard at work during last night’s game, capturing snotrockets and tweeting them out. Snotrocket in the second inning:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19

 

Top of the 5th snotrocket:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-1

 

Strength and excellence:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-2-tweet

 

Bonus Bumgarner screencap – his cup runneth over:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-cup-twitching

 

Of course it wouldn’t be a Giants vs. Dodgers (ew) game without some blood boiling and tempers flaring. It started innocently enough with Yasiel Puig (ew) grounding out in the bottom of the 7th. Bumgarner fielded the ball, flipped it to Belt who made the out at 1st. No problem. Except there was:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-espn-dont-look-at-me

 

You heard Bumgarner. Don’t look at him:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-mcculloughtimes-dont-look-at-me

 

I can’t embed videos in this blog without paying exorbitant fees so if you want to see what happened click on these orange words for MLB’s official video of the incident.

Also do yourself a favor and click on this to hear Vin Scully’s description of the Bumgarner-Puig incident.

I just hope Bumgarner doesn’t shave his head:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-brooksknudsen-travis-bickle

 

You heard what Bumgarner said, Puig. Why you still looking at him?

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-puig-dont-look-at-me

 

In this photo Puig is on the far left and Bumgarner in the middle of the crowd on the far right:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-puig-dont-look-at-me-fight

 

The above photo is especially noteworthy because:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-vegasjoe680-contain

 

This photo is the only thing I like about the Giants bullpen:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-bullpen-1

 

Of course I had no problem with any of this:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-love-bumgarner

 

I need for this to happen:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-dont-look-at-me-shirt

 

Before I forget I wanted to include this incredible work of art. Giants fan @IAmJerklord made this a while ago but it came in handy during last night’s game. Saturn Bumgarner devouring Puig:

giants-bumgarner-devouring-puig-saturn-iamjerklord

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Saturday, September 24, 2016 on the road vs. the San Diego Padres. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

One last thing:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-19-tweet-fl-dont-even-talk

Glum Snotrockets

 

The Giants played the Padres. The Giants lost to the Padres. Madison Bumgarner pitched. Madison Bumgarner blew snotrockets. That’s all I got. What a glum game. What a glum series. What a glum second half. GLUM I TELL YOU GLUM.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Wednesday, September 14, 2016 at home vs. the San Diego Padres:

 

  • L, 6.2 IP, 7 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, 3 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. lefties, 0 vs. righties, 2 other. 2 pre-game SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 2 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 214 snotrockets in the 2016 season.

 

Snotrocket screencapper @SanDiegoGiants was on glum assignment and thus was not able to capture any glum snotrockets.

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Monday, Sept. 19, 2016 on the road vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers. See you here or on Twitter for all the glum snotrocket action.

Insufficient Snotrockets

 

I don’t like it when Madison Bumgarner blows too few snotrockets. I also don’t like it when Madison Bumgarner gives up too many home runs. Both happened tonight but fortunately the Giants bats woke up and they scored just enough runs to nullify those DBacks homers. Giants bats could do nothing about the lack of snotrockets though.

The San Francisco Giants were in Arizona tonight to play the DBacks with Madison Bumgarner the starting pitcher for the Giants. Snotrocket conditions at the start of the game:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-tweet-fl

 

A milestone moment on the line tonight:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-tweet-sfgiants

 

You’ll get that 100th victory next time, Madison. And blow some celebratory snotrockets to boot.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Friday, September 9, 2016 on the road vs. the Arizona Diamondbacks:

 

  • ND, 6.0 IP, 6 H, 1 BB, 4 R, 4 ER, 9 K, 2 HR, 2 SNR: 0 vs. L, 1 vs. R, 1 other.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 2 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 211 snotrockets in the 2016 season.

 

Unfortunately @SanDiegoGiants was on assignment for the only inning that Bumgarner blew his snotrockets but he did capture some marvelous loogies. In the 6th inning there were 2 Bumgarner loogies and both were captured.

Loogie #1:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-loogie

 

Loogie #2:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-loogie-1

 

Everything Bumgarner does is capture-worthy:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-crotch-grab-tweet

 

I mean everything:

giants-bumgarner-snotrocket-2016-09-09-glove-chew-tweet

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Wednesday, September 14, 2016 at home vs. the San Diego Padres. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

Windy City Snotrockets

 

Ivy + snotrockets = good times.

The San Francisco Giants were in Chicago this weekend to play the Cubs. Madison Bumgarner had a great game Saturday, with much good pitching, fury and plenty snotrocketing. It was all I could have ever asked for.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, September 3, 2016 on the road vs. the Chicago Cubs:

 

  • W, 6.0 IP, 5 H, 0 BB, 2 R, 2 ER, 10 K, 9 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 6 vs. righties, 3 other. 1 pre-game SNR. 1 bullpen SNR. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Madison Bumgarner blew at least 1 snotrocket in every inning he pitched today.
  • Bumgarner now with 209 snotrockets in the 2016 season.

 

Unparalleled snotrocket screencapper @SanDiegoGiants finely crafted some of his art today for all to enjoy. In this snotrocket screencap the home plate umpire appears to be taking aim at something:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-Tweet

 

I can never eat sandwiches again:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-2-Tweet

 

Two screencaps for the price of one – a snotrocket and its frequent companion, the nose wipe:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-3-Tweet

 

Snotrocket:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-3

 

Nose wipe:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-3-Nose Wipe

 

So Bumgarner got the win today but it wasn’t made easy for him:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-Tweet-Strike Zone

 

The erratic strike zone and a questionable balk call today brought about one of my favorites – MadBum fury. My G-rated interpretation of Bumgarner’s commentary:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-Tweet-Lip Reading

 

The SF Giants made a custom Madison Bumgarner emoji:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-Tweet-Emoji

 

I added one small, crucial detail:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2016-09-03-Tweet-Emoji-1

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Friday, September 9th, 2016 on the road vs. the Arizona Diamondbacks. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action.

%d bloggers like this: